BDSM Basics for Beginners

BDSM is a lot like martial arts. You’ll have seen glimpses of it a couple times growing up, found it attractive, and likely thought that you could just dive into it easy-peasy. You technically could—but not without the risk of getting your ass whooped in the not-so-fun way.

Check out these articles below to brush up on the much appreciated ways we can make your first foray into these practices a safe, sane, and consensual one—so that you and your partner can keep coming back for more!

References & Recommendations

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“Should you grab some rope from the hardware store, find a partner, and just go at it? Maaaybe not… 

Here are 5 actionable steps so you can get started.”

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“The myth is that it’s abusive. Actually it’s about trust and communication.”

Online Quiz

Not sure which kinks or roles to try out? Take this educational quiz to find out where you are on the BDSM spectrum!

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Domina Chase writes: “Have you ever read a BDSM article or discussion thread then suddenly became lost in the vocabulary? Have you ever learned of a new kink but the cis-het or binary language seems to exclude you? Do you just want to find a new kink to explore?

The freshly published Humanistic BDSM glossary at DominaChase.com is here to help!”

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Velma writes: “This is a collection of online materials that are useful for newbies and any kinksters. Hubris is the leading cause of injuries, and learning is a constant journey. This will be my Reader’s Digest and I’ll keep adding to it over time. Feel free to send me suggestions by posting links in the comments.”
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Sub Frenzy is a very real threat that puts newbies at risk and makes us more vulnerable to predators. Find out what it means!

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Sub Frenzy is a very real threat that puts newbies at risk and makes us more vulnerable to predators. Find out what it means!

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In an effort to describe in detail the differences between BDSM activities and abuse, practitioners of BDSM have created and relied upon two prominent mottos of their community and lifestyle choices, SSC and RACK.

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My recommended safety guideline/philosophy for any kink/BDSM practice.

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Whether you’re new to BDSM or not, research and reading will be your constant companion throughout your kink journey. The BDSM Wiki is a helpful resource to get you started!

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My recommended safety guideline/philosophy for any kink/BDSM practice.